User: “I need a bronse statue of mermaid!”

Linux: “Here is a bronse cube 1m X 1m X 1m and a rasp.”

Gentoo: “Here is copper, tin and blast furnace.”

FreeBSD: “Here is your pick and helmet with a flashlight. Copper mine is that way.”

Ubuntu: “Here is your statue!”
User: “But there is only the tail!”
Ubuntu: “Please enter apt-get install head, hands, body”

MacOS: “Here are beautiful naked girls.”
User: “Wow! Can I touch them?”
MacOS: “Please pay $200 to activate function ‘Touch naked girls’”

Windows: “No. I think you definitely need an iron statue of Lincoln”